This Charming Man
by Duderman
Summary: Cloti. Cloud is stranded in a naturistic desolate. He decided to give his past life another try while hitching a ride in Tifa's car. He has to tell her how he feels, how he had always felt. But talking is never enough.


Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy 7.

This is a short, one-shot fic. It's based loosly off of the Lyrics of The Smith's song; "This Charming Man". This song is, originally, a homosexual song when analyzed. I made some changes to the song here and there and editted that effect. The original song is one of the best ever written, and I would recommend anyone to listen to it.

Reviews (feedback) would be greatly appreciated; I'll do my best to respond to any reviewers.

Enjoy

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_**A punctured bicycle  
**__**on a hillside desolate  
can nature make a man of me yet?**_

A lone motorcycle sped across a desolate, darkness covered landscape; it's lush, green fields only visible when shone upon with the sun's light. Now, the darkness was coming from 3 sides to torment Cloud.

He was headed west, towards what he honestly did not know. The sun was beginning to set, giving the sky and clouds a monotonously boring shade of crimson and yellow. Colors had pained Cloud as of late.

The dark landscape began to close in on Cloud from either side; soon the sun would lose all it's power over the shadowy abyss; consuming the area in darkness, feeding Cloud's overwhelming sense of danger, and general paranoia.

There was also a strange phenomina taking place behind Cloud. The sun's range was decreasing; its light retreating into the west. This meant that soon, the sun's rays would pass over Cloud, and far beyond the hills. But instead of the rays killing him, as an ant would be killed by the rays of the sun reflected off of a magnifying glass; the sun would abandon him, leaving him to dwell in the darkness. His path would only lighted by the feeble, now slowly fading light of Fenrir's front and tail lights. The wheels supporting said feebly fading lights came to an abrupt decrease in speed, and then full stop. Fenrir's engine had died.

By now, the sun had retreated almost completely west, out of Cloud's range of vision and into the distance.

'_A punctured tire… but how…?' _He thought

Now was not the time to question his vehicle's fate. He had a journey to begin, a distance to cross. But this time he would be walking, and all the light will have faded.

Cloud thought… he thought of the darkness… of how she would probably already have closed the bar by the time he made up an excuse to swing by after a long day of deliveries… as he always had done.

Cloud stared across the grassy, hillside desolate…

He wondered, as he began to force his sore legs to a stride across the side of the road;

'_Can this nature make a man of me yet…?'_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_**And on this charming night**_

A flickering of lights in the distance seemed to be both curious, uncomfortable and a relief to Tifa, as the prospect of being able to ask a stranger for directions became an option. What would make this situation so uncomfortable is, of course, that the stranger is in fact a stranger.

But what she saw forced her to replace her dread of awkwardness with a feeling of betrayal, longing and fear. The flickering lights seemed to be generated by Fenrir, quite the familiar sight, but as of late she had seen little of this monster-motorcycle and its owner.

A burst of emotions exploded in Tifa's chest as she slowed to a stop at the scene:

'_Where is he?'_

'_Is he alright?' _

'_Is he hurt?' _

She ignored her feelings, as she had always done around him. She had become accustomed to this process over the past few years. Her pain was replaced by a brief feeling of relief as she saw a figure in the distance; a figure that could only belong to one person.

As she neared the figure, the car's lights shone the figure's back; eliminating the little amount of doubt Tifa had as to who it was. The First Tsurugi's shining build was complimented by her headlights; drawing her attention to the weapon, and his attention to her, or rather the vehicle. It might have taken him a few moments, but he soon recognized the vehicle and its driver.

"Tifa" He said, as she had slowed to a stop and unrolled her window, looking worried, but trying to smile as she observed his slumped and tired figure.

"Need a ride, Cloud?" She asked, trying to sound sweet, charming… but above all; friendly. She wanted to wipe any memory of her ever have been taken with him from anyone's memory. He simply nodded. His nods meant the world to Tifa. His eyes were full of meaning and implication when he did this, a sight that used to make Tifa melt…

'_Not anymore… of course not…' _She added in her mind.

Cloud thought of a few things as he walked towards the unlocked door. He wondered about the choices he had made. Choices he had made concerning this beautiful, young barmaid.

'_Why did I have to pamper my life's complexity__...?' _He thought, sitting down on the car's comfortable seat.

'…_when the leather runs smooth on the passenger's seat?' _

- - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_**I would go out tonight  
But I haven't got a stitch to wear  
**__**this man said "It's gruesome that someone so beautiful should care"  
**__  
_

The car made its way across the road; its direction aided by Cloud's knowledge of this area, but for the rest proceeded quite silently. Tifa's poor orientation when it came to geography was something that had always charmed Cloud. This was one of those things he never let slip when they had still lived in the same home. One of the many emotions he had never expressed.

Tifa smiled at Cloud, as she must've noticed his eyes on her. He could only guess how uncomfortable she must've been feeling at that moment, with his unwelcome eyes upon her. Her beautiful, strawberry scented hair, her wonderfully smooth, ivory skin and her shapely figure shone in the moonlight. These were all things Cloud has longed for, but all things he was too much of a coward to claim when he still had the chance.

His eyes were quickly diverted from her when a loud ringtone, coming from Cloud's direction, briefly allowed Tifa's eyes to rest on Cloud before grabbing the cellphone and flipping it open. Cloud would have listened, but when the words "Hey, baby" escape Tifa's lips… he had suddenly been overwhelmed with a strong feeling of nausia. He didn't feel like listening. All he could do was stare at the ring on her finger, and feel sorry for himself… sorry for the fact that he hadn't been the one to place it on her slender finger.

After a short while, Cloud's superior hearing allowed him to detect that the words coming out of Tifa's mouth now were louder, and directed at him. He broke from his trance.

"…But I can't go out tonight unless I have something to wear…" She said, smiling at Cloud, as though this little problem was enough to break the tension between them, the tension that had ruled their lives for as long as Cloud could remember.

"It's gruesome…" He said, slowly…

She stared, taken-a-back. Her mind was self-conscious and doubtful whenever around him, she might have feared that he was making a comment about her appearance, or her words.

"…that someone as beautiful as you should care about what to wear."

She blushed.

- - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - -

_**A messed up country**__** boy  
who never knew his place  
He said "return the ring"  
He knows so much about these things  
He knows so much about these things  
**_

His comment had made her want to cry, smile, laugh, scream and blush even more than she already was. But she kept her composure, her dignity. She wouldn't fall for him again, not now, not now that she was finally on the way to something good… on the way to a smile.

She had sensed his eyes on her face, her legs… her ring… this was a side of Cloud she had never seen, one he had kept hidden from her for so long. And if that was the way he wanted it… he could have fucking told her… those were her thoughts on the matter.

"How are the kids…?" He had asked. She took a while to sigh heavily, and the respond.

"Good… they… they're doing well in school." She said, smiling.

Cloud waited a few seconds before opening his mouth again… he didn't want to rush this.

"And how are you, Tifa?"

Now it was her turn to pause, and blush yet again. She wondered if he ever blushed…

"I… I'm doing well…" She said. She felt attacked, flattered and angry as she tried to comprehend the attention she was receiving from him… the attentiveness in his voice… the charm in his eyes… She hated him for doing this, why now?

"Reno's doing well too." She added.

She wished she could have left out the harshness in her voice… but above all she wished she could take away the splinter of sadness he felt when those words escaped her lips. She had felt it too.

"That's good…" He said, almost chocking on his words. He needed to speak with her about this, now. He realized the pain he had caused her, he realized the distance he had put between him and her was far greater than that of between Kalm and Edge…

Tifa kept her eyes on the road as she felt Cloud's heavy breathing next to her. She noticed his transition from his usual laid-back, sober respiration; to this heavy… almost nervous breath-intake that made her both dread and long for the words that would come.

_**A messed up country**__** boy  
who never knew his place  
He said "return the ring"  
He knows so much about these things  
He knows so much about these things**_

Cloud's chest was host to countless emotions as he prepared to vocalize these emotions and feelings that he had kept locked up for so long… that he was afraid he might not be able to express them anymore.

"Tifa" He said. His tone was firm, delicate, and certain.

She looked over towards him, smiling. She was going to act as though nothing was wrong. She wasn't going to make this easy for him; she was going to make him struggle, as he had made her for so long.

"I know we never talked much… not even when we still had contact… but I want you to know... that it isn't as though there was nothing to say. I just couldn't figure out how to say it… or how to express it, I didn't know what I was feeling. It had been the same feeling I had felt all those years in Nibelheim… all those months in Shinra…" He paused briefly, choking on his words.

He didn't care he was showing weakness, he didn't care that he may seem weak to others; it didn't matter. What was strength and endurance when you had no one to protect?

"But… this time… It was as though… you were finally within my reach. You were waiting for me… I had been hurt in the past and...-"

Tifa snapped her head towards him, tears sliding down her cheeks as she did so.

"-not by you… but… everything that had happened. Zack… my being denied into Soldier… I formed a whole other personality… I tried to bury my feelings. I wasn't good enough for you, I didn't deserve you. Every test I had ever made for myself, I failed. All the times I wanted to prove to you… how I felt… I had failed." He said. His words were honest; heart-felt… they both knew that this was what he had truly felt all these years.

But this did not make up for all the times he had ignored her; made her cry.

"So please…" He said, not sounding desperate… but calm, firm… all the things that had charmed her over the years…

'…_This charming man…' _

"Please… stop the car… look at me… search deep inside yourself and tell me how you feel…" He said again.

"And take off that ring."

The car came to a slow stop… its driver staring at her lap, shaking… hysterical. He tried to calm her by placing his hand on her shoulder… but his hand was swatted away, like a fly, like nothing.

'_Maybe that's all I mean to her now__…' _

The evening had long since made its transition into night as Tifa stepped out of the car, quickly followed by Cloud. As she made her way across the baron landscape, off of the road, and into the darkness… Cloud wondered…

'_Tifa… or seclusion… a path back into being a recluse, the path into obscurity…' _

'_This is hardly a choice'_ he thought as he began to sprint after her, utilizing what little energy he had left in his legs, and whatever else had kept him going all these years without her…

He found her, hair in the wind and on both knees, crying… looking beautiful… charming…

A sudden fear gripped Cloud, he couldn't speak… he couldn't think… massive protesting from his lunges and legs forced him to one knee, gripping his side. His knees recognized the earth around him before his eyes did. This was the cliff… the sword was proof of this, placed slightly right of Tifa, its ugly rusting figure shining in the moonlight.

In that moment, while they were both idly staring at the stars… the moon… the evening sky… Cloud felt a surge of emotion as he observed his the surroundings that had drastically changed over the past few hours.

He felt a strong sense of foreboding as he observed the Shinra HQ in Midgar…

_A monument of our mistakes… Never to __disappear, but forever to remain as a symbol, a meaning; a lesson everyone had learned._

He felt a powerful feeling of failure, shame and anger as he laid his eyes on Zack's old sword…

_He didn't need to die… It was my fault, my weakness that killed him. He died to defend me… this weak and broken man. _

He felt an even more overwhelmingly powerful surge of emotions as he laid his eyes on the most beautiful thing the planet had to offer him on this night… The stars, the moon… they all paled in comparison…

Tifa was what he had been longing for all these years… but all of his past mistakes… all of his uncertainties, paranoias, phobias and weaknesses… had kept him from wanting to get closer to anyone ever again… But now he was ready to forget; to start a-fresh…

And he expressed this, not through words… no, words were one of Cloud's dire weaknesses…

"How much would I…"

She stopped.

"How much would _we_ mean to you?"

Cloud knew very well who she meant by 'we', and was prepared to answer all of her questions as he made his way towards the edge of the cliff.

She watched him go; hoping, wondering….

_**A **__**messed up country boy  
who never knew his place  
He said "return the ring"  
He knows so much about these things  
He knows so much about these things**_

"The pain… regret…"

_Aeris_

"…revenge…"

_Sephiroth_

"…guilt…"

_Zack_

What followed was the sound of Cloud unsheathing the First Tsrugi, groaning under its weight, and throwing it as hard as he could… far, far away from him; him and his family.

"…would all become trivial in comparison to how much I care for my family"

And then, Cloud finally covered the distance between them; except that this time, they were both running…

Together, Cloud and Tifa move twice as fast.

_**And on this charming night  
this charming man**_

_**Why pamper life's complexity  
When the leather runs smooth  
on the passenger seat?**_


End file.
